Breakups are tough. It’s a different form of grief, a loss of a person’s presence and all the memories that come with that relationship. No one can ever really prepare for it. Yet, we all experience ‘the breakup pain’ at one point in our lives— whether it’s young love or a more mature one.
A week ago, Quark Henares, a Filipino film director, reminded me of the film, ‘Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind’ in our podcast episode on Romcoms. The story centers around Joel and Clementine, two strangers that fall in and out of love.
In the course of the movie, they break up and choose to undergo a procedure that removes their painful memories of their relationship. There is beauty in seeing the unimaginable happen—having the choice to erase horrible memories.
I wonder if this invention ever became a reality, would we choose to remove these painful memories? Would we be better for it? Or would we go through the same complicated and messy path as Joel and Clementine? This procedure feels like taking a rapid Advil for a headache. A quick fix. An easy remedy. Yet, I also think of the happy memories that may get erased I making a similar choice as Joel and Clementine.
The best solution to a breakup is allowing time to heal oneself.
Give yourself the time to remember the good and the bad.
Be gentle. Be kind to yourself and the other.
Breakups are tough. But we all get through them.
